Painful season

I am alone with love all around me
Lost in the midst of salvation
Raped by the evil of the world
Rejected most of all by me
Weary and want real faith

Cry

empty
shattered
lonely
i cry
 
listen
help
save us
i cry
 
surrendered
our
body
souls
and minds
 
please
Jesus
help
us
i cry
 

grief

The moon is full the sky bright the stars gaze back at me as I sit wailing with Sara on the box and sipping Shiraz.

The window is open I gaze out in wonder at the beauty of it all the power of creation then worry, can anyone hear?

Shadows fall, candlelight dancing across the floor, my attempt at solitude, at peace, cluttered with reality.

I sing louder wishing I was better, wishing for something never gained. The bleak places of the heart cloud the beauty of the moment as I wonder, why?

My heart drifts to and from the beauty to pain then sadness so deep only the supernatural can sustain me.

To be covered in beauty yet blind as I selfishly crumble I gaze at my existence in wonder and ask what makes a valid life?

Trying to make since of those blessed or cursed finding myself in both realities fighting to make since of it all.

As I sit, wailing with Sara tears steaming down my face sipping Shiraz wondering at the beauty of it all

can anyone hear the sadness?